


Three Sentence Fics

by avesnongrata



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Western, Alternate Universe - Zombie Apocalypse, Crossover, Domestic Fluff, F/F, Height Differences
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-03
Updated: 2017-07-27
Packaged: 2018-02-16 01:14:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 1,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2250381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/avesnongrata/pseuds/avesnongrata
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bite-sized fics! Everything from crossover AUs to domestic fluff, in about three sentences each.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Dog Park

**Author's Note:**

> I'm terrible at remembering to tag my tumblr posts, so here is a running collection of all of the things I've written for the three-sentence fic meme, all in one place!
> 
> Have a request? Leave it in the comments!  
> My tumblr ask box is also open (avesnongrata) if you prefer. Just make sure you say it's for the three-sentence fic meme, please.

"I swear to god, Natasha, if you get caught this time I'm not bailing you out," Maria hissed, glancing nervously around the deserted street corner.

Natasha ignored her and continued to climb. "Just keep an eye out for the Sheriff's Secret Police and I won't get caught!" she called down, throwing a leg over the top of the fence.


	2. Zombie Apocalypse

"Nat, if they turn me, I promise I won't eat you," Maria shouts, pressing her back up against Natasha's and lifting her baseball bat into position in front of her.

"Are you kidding, Hill?" Natasha laughs over the bone-chilling moans of the zombie horde that's closing in around them and flicks off the safety on her semi-automatic. "If they turn me, I'm gonna eat you first!"


	3. Height Difference

Maria rounded the corner into her kitchen to come face-to-face with Natasha's ass. 

"Not that I'm complaining, Nat, but what are you doing?"

"If you kept your coffee mugs on a lower shelf like a normal-sized person, I wouldn't have to climb on the counter to reach them, would I?"


	4. Height Difference II

Tony and Steve pop back up above the water, both of them spluttering and gawking at Natasha, who is still perched securely on Maria's shoulders. No one expected Natasha and Maria to become the undefeated Chicken Fight Champions of the Avengers bonding time/pool party, but thanks to Natasha's habit of climbing up onto Maria's shoulders every time she makes fun of her for being short, the two of them make an unstoppable team. 

Natasha laughs triumphantly and fist-bumps Maria as she turns them to face the rest of their assembled teammates, the two of them crowing in unison, "Who's next?!"


	5. Western AU

Maria isn't sure which is more chilling: the cool click of the revolver being pressed to the base of her skull, or the warm tickle of the Widow's voice against her ear.

"Call off your men, Sheriff Hill; they'll never find where I've hidden that gold."

"You sure about that, Widow?" Maria drawls, tossing back the rest of her whiskey as her other hand reaches for the Smith & Wesson at her hip.


	6. High on Painkillers

Say what you want about S.H.I.E.L.D. med staff, they certainly don't shy away from issuing truly potent painkillers. Maria chuckles as Natasha giggles (honest-to-god giggles!) at the gritty action movie on the screen in front of them.

"Remind me again how a highly-trained master assassin managed to break her wrist slipping in the shower?" she teases affectionately, pulling Natasha into her lap and kissing her shoulder.


	7. A Bad Case of the Hiccups

The entire bed shakes suddenly, startling Natasha awake for the eighth time that night. "For fuck's sake, Hill, drink some water or something; I'm trying to sleep," she groans, rolling over to swat Maria hard with her pillow.

"I warned you: this is -HIC!- what you get for pinning me down and -HIC!- tickling me for that long, Natasha!"


	8. Shopping for their new apartment

"Natasha, this is completely inappropriate," Maria growls, going scarlet as Natasha straddles her waist and pins her to the bed with her arms above her head. 

"Relax, I'm just trying to get an accurate impression of this mattress on this frame."

"I know that," Maria lowers her voice and glances around self-consciously, "but do we have to do it in the middle of the fucking showroom?"


	9. Breaking and Entering

"Jesus Christ, Natasha, not again," Maria gasps, nearly jumping out of her skin when she comes into her bathroom to find Natasha lounging sleepily in her bathtub.

"It's good to see you, too," Natasha teases, flicking water at her.

"You know," Maria sighs, exasperated, "I should make you a punch card: break into my apartment while I'm at work 10 times, get a spare set of keys for free."


	10. Paper Cuts

Maria hisses in pain and surprise as the edge of the folder she'd just closed slices through the skin of her knuckle.

"That's what you get for bringing work home on your night off," Natasha teases, reaching for Maria's hand so she can slip her wounded finger into her mouth.

"Gross, Nat, that's unsanitary," Maria grimaces, but she has no intention of pulling away.


	11. Back Seat (a High School AU)

"What do you mean, 'you've never done this before'?" Maria asks, confused, her hand freezing halfway down Natasha's pants. "What about James, and Clint, and Matt..." she trails off as Natasha starts to laugh, the self-conscious blush fading from her face.

"My reputation is greatly exaggerated; none of them made it past second base."


	12. Body Scent

After an hour of staring up at the ceiling of her hotel room, Natasha finally gets out of bed and rummages in her bag. The shirt she pulls out and tugs over her head is a size or two too big for her, old and worn and soft against her skin. Best of all, it still smells like Maria, and while it's not nearly as good as actually curling up in her arms, she finally falls asleep wrapped in the warm, familiar scent.


	13. Tea vs. Coffee

Maria's whole face lights up as Natasha walks into her office and hands her a large cardboard cup over the stacks of paperwork cluttering her desk.

"I got you green tea today to help you cut back on your caffeine intake," Natasha deadpans, but she cracks when Maria blinks up at her looking absolutely crestfallen.

"I'm kidding! Of course it's coffee; I'm not a monster!"


	14. Alcohol

It absolutely breaks Maria's heart to see Natasha like this: sitting by herself on a park bench, drinking cheap vodka right from the bottle, beating herself up over her botched mission. At least she'd managed to convince Natasha to trade the vodka for the cup of coffee she'd brought her. Maria settles down on the bench next to her and takes a swig herself, determined to keep Natasha company for as long as she'll let her.


	15. Scratches

"Dammit, Natasha, those are gonna last all week!" Maria groans, craning her neck to inspect the scratches criss-crossing the whole way down her back.

Natasha grins and shrugs unapologetically. "Just think of it as payback for the hickey you gave me last weekend."


	16. Toothbrush

"We've only been dating for a few months; it's not that serious," Maria insists, trying to end the conversation so Barton will get the hell out of her office.

"But Natasha lets you keep a toothbrush at her apartment, right?" Clint prompts with a knowing smirk. "Natasha doesn't let _anyone_ keep stuff at her place; to her, you two are practically living together."


	17. Starving

"Did you skip lunch, Hill, you look like you're starving," Natasha asks as she ducks into the sparring ring, all pent-up energy and barely-contained mischief.

"No, I had lunch earlier," Maria answers cautiously, her eyebrow rising along with the feeling that she's about to walk right into whatever Natasha's trying to set up.

"I hope you saved room, 'cause you're about to eat mat!" Natasha shouts and tackles her.


	18. Show-Off

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for maigonokaze

Even though it’s been years since the last time Maria laced up a pair of skates and took to the ice, it isn’t long before she’s etching lap after reckless lap, wisps of frosty breath trailing behind. 

Natasha winks as she meanders gracefully around her, cheeks tinged pink in the cold, skates hissing and scraping as she spins and turns with practiced ease. She pulls off camel spin after Salchow after toe loop, each one landing with all the poise and skill she always seems to exude - that is, until Maria hip checks her clear across the pond.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fuck Nick Spencer, for real.

Maria's hands shook as she unfolded the slip of paper she'd found on her bedside table.

_Be careful with the model 9.4 LMDs_ , the note warned in thin, flowing script, signed only with an hourglass. _Apparently they deactivate if you break their jaws. :(_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No way Natasha Romanoff dies from writing that bad.


End file.
